Why being kind makes you happier!

Earlier this week, Lara in London sent me this wonderful article in The Sydney Morning Herald (her husband worked on the studies involved at, and it really hit home with me. The article shows a link between kindness and happiness.

Reading it, I was reminded of an analogy my friend, Jeremy, shared with me earlier this year. He explained that when he’s stuck in really bad traffic and running late, and he’s really angry and annoyed, he simply lets people in. He stops to let cars turn into his lane and go ahead of him. Not just one, he said, but several. He said to me, “We’re all going to be late, we’re all going to arrive within seconds of each other, and it really doesn’t matter if you let five or even ten cars go in front of you. BUT… it makes you feel so much happier and you feel less annoyed being in traffic!” He used this analogy to explain that when things aren’t going his way in life, when he’s feeling angry or annoyed, he just does something nice. He turns the negative energy in his mind and body into something positive, and it has an overall effect on his state of mind. Being kind makes you happy. Of course it does! 

A few months ago I was going through a particular period of feeling vulnerable and upset, I felt vengeful and angry. Jeremy explained to me that nothing would make me feel better than just being nice. And I literally followed his advice and felt it working day after day. Try it next time you’re angry. Try thinking nice things about someone who has hurt you. Try helping a stranger at the supermarket. Try letting cars in when you’re stuck in traffic. Try little acts of kindness everywhere.  I promise it works! It’s a good thing to teach your kids too.

Courtney x




Comments (6)

Lisa Gardner
October 4, 2019

I love you Courtney. You are so kind and thoughtful. I agree being kind always makes me feel better but I find it hard to forgive people when I’m betrayed. It’s very hard for me. I wish I could let go of that. Being kind to strangers though so easy for me. The car analogy is funny because my kids go to a school that’s on a busy street. And I always let other mums go before me even if it means I miss the window to get out of it takes me longer. And there are mum’s that will wave thanks AND MUMS THAT DONT. And there are mum’s that will let you go and wave you on with a smile when no one is watching but you AND MUMS THAY WONT. And you and I are the mums that do this when no one is watching. 😉❤️

October 4, 2019

I can’t agree more. The more you practice kindness and any kind of elevated feelings such as gratitude, joy, happiness etc , the more you open up to receive from the world around you. We all feel negative at times and it takes work to broadcast kindness instead of resentment when life throws us challenges. But investing ones energy and practicing, staying open and grateful to what we have and not what we don’t will allow great things to enter in our lives. We need to show our kids that we can walk the talk.

October 4, 2019

I like your honesty and good for you for addressing feelings positively.

October 5, 2019

This is one of the best posts I’ve read—thank you for sharing! I find that when we’re kind in a challenging situation, I have dominion over that experience. It’s empowering. But, helpful to be reminded that this is an option. 😉

October 10, 2019

This is so true! I work with the public and at times it really tests you and can get you down if you choose to. I often check my mindset before I start work and I use the term ‘kill them with kindness’ so no matter how grumpy or angry/rude people can be with my team and I, I choose to be kind and polite. It really helps you cope with trials. I feel for you Courtney, you’ve had your share of unkindness in social media and I really respect how you’ve dealt with it. There’s always going to be jealous people or haters out there, but how you deal with it really shows strength. X

India Noble
January 5, 2020

So funny your friend Jeremy used a car analogy because recently it hit home to me while I was in my car that when people are rude/grumpy etc to you it’s a reflection on them, not you. I realised that when I’m in a good mood, not running late etc I let people in all the time but when I’m late or grumpy I get road ragey haha (not actual road rage but I get cross under my breath etc). One day I realised that the other cars are doing exactly the same thing but its me who’s had a change in mood and reaction. No matter how many times people have tried to reassure me (or me reassure them) during tough times that its probably the other person who has something tough going on we don’t know about to make them act hurtful to us. It wasn’t till I had this realisation in the car that I actually started to believe it!! I guess now I’ll try to remember to let people in any time and hopefully it will cheer me up/relax me a bit 🙂

Leave a Comment