The tooth fairy visit
There was a lot of excitement in our house last week. My daughter (a few days shy of her 5th birthday) lost her first tooth. I remember when I was little, wiggling and twisting my loose teeth until they fell out. However, when my daughter had the same fascination with her wiggly tooth it made me feel so queasy!
When the tooth finally came out there were a few tears from her as I think she got a fright, but when I mentioned that she could put it under her pillow that night for the tooth fairy to collect, the tears stopped. So that day Mia drew a picture for the tooth fairy and left the picture with her tooth under her pillow. In the morning the tooth fairy had taken her tooth and picture and left her $2. How much does the tooth fairy pay for teeth at your house?
Stephxo
ONE YEAR AGO WE WROTE ABOUT:
• Pixie Lily — heirloom clothing, for baby• Natural Paint Kit from Shak-Shuka
Bringing up bilingual
A friend of mine recently referred to the way my 3-year-old daughter speaks as Creole. It a great way of describing it: she speaks an absolute mixture of French and English. Phrases like “Can you s’il te please tirer my culotte” (please pull up my undies) are very normal in our household and it is so cute I don’t want it to change! But it won’t last; she is quickly learning to differentiate her two languages.
In our household I try to only speak English at home and the children are exposed to French at school and with their friends. I myself grew up with a French mother, and an Irish father but spent my childhood in Germany, so I grew up speaking English, French and German. I actually now have a bit of an accent in every language I speak! As a child I really did not enjoy coming from a multi-lingual family as I felt I was different from my friends. My girls have the great advantage of going to an inner-city Paris school where a huge amount of the kids speak at least two languages, if not more.
So now that I am trying to bring up my kids bi-lingually myself, I have done a bit of research. I am not an expect in anyway, but here are some of the facts I thought were interesting:
- Being bi-lingual or tri-lingual has nothing to do with intelligence, people of different levels of intelligence are multi-lingual.
- Children start differentiating between languages around the ages of 2-3.
- Bi-lingual children do not usually learn to speak later because of learning different languages, as previously thought.
- One of the simplest approaches towards having bilingual children seems to be the one-parent/one-language approach. It is easier for a child to differentiate a language if one person speaks one language consistently to them.
Voila! I am really interested to hear if anyone else has tips and ideas on how to bring up kids with several languages!
- Emilie
ONE YEAR AGO WE WROTE ABOUT:
• Win! Broer&Zus outfit of choice!• Julia Eccleshare’s top ten book list
• Top Ten Book Lists
Do you take your kids to see Santa?
Every year of my childhood my mom took us to see Santa. We would drive into the city, head to the big department store and wait for hours in the queue to see Santa. I still remember standing there with all my siblings, waiting eagerly to see him, and my mom telling us all to behave and stand patiently! My mom has kept all the santa photos in one big album… and it’s hilarious to look through them. From the time I was a baby (crying on Santa’s lap) until the time I was 20 (looking very awkward standing next to him!), there is a photo from every year.
Isn’t it funny how some kids LOVE santa and others think he’s the scariest thing they’ve ever seen? My now four-year-old has cried every year we’ve visited Santa. And he told me the other day that this year when we go he wants to sit on a stool, not Santa’s lap. (Sweet.)
So tell me, is visiting Santa a tradition you did when you were younger? Do you now take your own kids to see Santa? I’m curious to know which countries do and don’t do this!
xx Courtney
p.s. That photo is of my two boys when they were younger (2½ and 6mos) and it’s my favourite of all our Santa photos. I just love how they’re both crying… and Santa looks so perfectly poised!
Musical instruments (and lessons)
Our daughter Sara started playing the violin when she was 5 years old. She has now been playing for over half a year, and can finally play simple songs like ‘Frère Jacques’. Sweet! My husband and I are hoping that an early start with playing musical instruments will help our children develop an interest in music and an ease to play instruments later on in life (might they still be interested).
Practising is still a little bit of an issue though — Sara’s teacher says she has to practise daily for at least 15 minutes, but I find it really hard to keep her to it. After school she has play-dates, swimming or ballet class, or is simply too tired. She’s only 6, I keep telling myself, but maybe I should be a bit more strict about it!
Sara’s little brother Pim, now 4, has been obsessed with trumpets for nearly 2 years now. I’ve unsuccessfully tried to re-direct his passion to other instruments (like the guitar) — not that I don’t like trumpets, I’m just not sure about hearing it all day long! But Pim’s passion is indestructible so I think we’ve decided that Santa this year will bring a trumpet. Wish me luck!
Do your children play instruments? Which one? Did you play as a child? Did you study daily?
xxx Esther
The Truth About Trying
A friend recently told me about this amazing feature of video blogs on Redbook called “The Truth About Trying“. I thought it was a fantastic way to personalize and put a face to the issues that many women silently face. Whether you have ten children, one child, or in the midst of trying for your first – the struggle to conceive is a difficult and emotionally taxing journey when it does not work out as planned. Thought I would pass along and give praise to Redbook for helping to bring light to an often closely guarded subject.
-Dina
(Image from Redbook)
ONE YEAR AGO WE WROTE ABOUT:
• Bloesem Gift Guide 2010• Some MOR pampering please!
• In the mood for Yellow
SWAP – A reading game that works!
After getting math tips from my son’s teacher last week, I then met with the reading support teacher who gave me all sorts of handy tips for helping kids with their reading. She introduced me to the game of SWAP… which has since become an obsession in our house (and has helped enormously with reading skills!). The game is easy — it’s like UNO but with words, and you can buy different games for different skills (there are currently 35 different games). Game 1 focuses on the vowels so you get words like hot, cup, den, cub, sat, etc., and you have to match the different vowel sounds. Game 2 focuses on ‘ch’, ’sh’ and ‘th’ sounds and includes words like fish, path, thin, crash, chin, chop, etc. Both my 4-year-old and my 6-year-old are hooked on the game — my son even asked if he could bring SWAP to the park this past weekend!! And, in only one week, both boys have improved their reading skills by leaps and bounds.
The games are available to purchase here (the website is unimpressive and somewhat clumsy, but seems to be the only place to get them).
-Courtney
Teaching basic math skills
I recently sat down with my son’s school teacher and she gave me a very brief suggestion for how to teach basic math skills to a six-year-old. She explained that they’re trying to get kids to think and count not just by ones, but also by fives and tens. She explained that they will take a number (say 38) and ask the kids how many tens go into this number, how many fives, and how many ones. I suppose it’s really division/multiplication without the kids knowing or really grasping that idea yet. The funny thing is, if you talk to kids in a certain causal way, they can actually sometimes do difficult math without knowing it. Even my 4-year-old surprises me with his ability to ‘get’ fractions.
This weekend we cut out a bunch of paper circles in three different sizes, and then labeled the circles with tens, fives and ones. Then we played with the numbers, adding them up and subtracting them to reach certain numbers. It’s such an easy project, and once you’ve made the numbers, you can keep them around for future math lessons. We brought out these numbers several times over the weekend to ‘play maths’, and the kids had no idea how much they were learning.
-Courtney
Becoming a Godmother
I was recently asked to become a godmother to my cousin’s little boy — a huge honour. The slight problem is that to become a godmother you do actually officially need to believe in God, which I don’t. I was brought up Catholic, but as a teenager decided that the Christian faith was not something that worked for me and have since cobbled together my own little philosophy — I think you could describe me as a happy agnostic. I do have great respect for all the religions of the world, but do not suscribe to any of them. So becoming a Godmother was a bit of a dilemma for me. I wanted to be someone special for this little boy and for him to have another adult person to turn to other than his parents. But I would not be able to promise to bring him closer to god.
I myself have also asked friends to be “godparents” for my girls, because I really like the idea of having friends become part of my family and my children having an adult other than me or their father to identify with… although we didn’t have a celebration of any kind, which I now regret as it would have been great to have a moment with friends and family to celebrate the birth of my daughters. This is the big advantage of organised religions: the important moments in life have a ceremony organised around them: weddings, births and funerals.
I did decide to become his godmother in the end. My cousin and his wife are completely aware of my religious beliefs or lack thereof, so I figured that if this was not a dilemma for them it wasn’t going to be one for me.
By the way, ceremony was great and was fascinating to watch Coco, who is now 5, trying to take it all in. It was the first time that she had ever been inside a church for a service and throughout the whole ceremony I was bombared with the “why” questions that she is famous for (Why is the lady at the front dressed in a white gown? Why is the baby boy wearing a long white dress? Why are people sitting, standing up and sitting down again? Why are they pouring water over the baby’s head? And who is this Jesus guy that they are talking about all the time?).
Brooke Reynolds’ Rules of Dinner
Brooke Reynolds, mother extraordinaire from the much-loved Inchmark blog, recently offered up her rules for family dinner over at Dinner A Love Story, and I was so inspired by her rules and her reasonings.
I don’t know about you, but dinner in our house usually goes something like this… ’Quin, take another bite…Ivy, eat your food……Easton, use your napkin, not your sleeve!….Ivy, scooch your chair in….Quin, eat your dinner!…Easton, clear your plate… etc.’ Dinner in our house is hardly a peaceful family time. In fact, I recently told my husband that it was my least favourite part of the day! I always feel like a broken record, saying the same thing over and over, constantly on edge and unable to enjoy that we’re all sitting around the table together.
After reading Brooke’s Ten Rules, I’m feeling inspired to make an effort. I love Rule No. 2 that ‘The Table is a Safe Place’ where only nice things are said (siblings don’t bicker, parents don’t lecture). I also like rule No. 8 to ‘Play High and Low’ where everyone tells the high and low point of their day. When I was growing up we did something similar: we all had to say one thing we did that day and one thing we learned. It made for interesting conversation! And lastly, I like rule No. 3 of ‘No Distractions’. Do you allow toys at the table? I need to be more strict about this — I find that toys are so distracting and give kids an excuse to zone out into ‘play time’ rather than family eating time.
Anyway, I’m feeling inspired. I’m going to try to make dinner a happy, more peaceful time in our house (fingers crossed!). What about you? Do you find dinner to be stressful? Do you have any other tips for making it more enjoyable? I would love to know!
-Courtney
Losing My Patience
A few hours ago, I caught my 4-year-old son Pim with his Micro Scooter in the living room. Now, Micro Scooters are intended for use outdoors, at least that’s the rule in our house. So I told him to put the scooter back in the hallway and I made my way to the kitchen. A few minutes later, I heard baby Ava (who had just had two nasty shots (jabs) and was feeling miserable) screaming and crying, I looked up, and saw Pim with his scooter in his hand, he clearly had run into the baby. I was so angry, I dragged him to the corner and yelled at him.
Fact: he disobeyed the rule in the first place, didn’t listen to me in the second place, and unjustly hurt Ava in the third place. I had the right to become angry. I try not to raise my voice too much, but sometimes I lose my patience and yell. I don’t like it but it occasionally happens — usually when they’ve been nagging me for a while, trying to find out how far they can go with me.
I do believe (I hope) that I’m human, and that my kids need to learn that there are borders, and that it’s ok for them to experience that their mother (exceptionally of course) may lose her patience if they go too far. It’s not nice, however (for both of us).
I sent Pim to his room so I could cool down and after 10 minutes we spoke about what happened, why I had become so angry, made sure he understood what he did wrong — and we apologised to each other and hugged bigtime. Peace is back in the house. And I’m promising myself to work on being more even-tempered!
I am always amazed by mothers who seem to never lose their patience, never seem to explode, reason with their children as if they are grown-ups. So tell me, do you think I am a terrible mother for losing my patience, or is it normal? Do you ever lose your patience or do you have a trick up your sleeve I should know about?? Yoga, meditation, medication? I’m very interested to hear.
xxx Esther
(photo from here)
Where Children Sleep
I just came across James Mollison’s photographic essay, Where Children Sleep, and I can’t stop staring at those touching photos. Mollison provides stories of diverse children around the world, told through portraits and pictures of their bedrooms. Some photos are simply heart wrenching, others totally fascinating. Isn’t it incredible how wide our world is and how differently people live? The book is written and presented for an audience of children 9-13 years old with the intention of showing kids the lives of other children around the world. Would you show your children? I will definitely show mine!
x Courtney
The Baby Chase
I must say, I am really liking that more and more information is starting to come to the forefront regarding the issues surrounding infertility. My mother pointed me towards this article entitled “My Fertility Crisis” which ran in the Wall Street Journal a few weeks ago and I thought it was a real eye-opener. All too often, when we DO actually hear about a woman’s struggle with conception, it is usually only discussed and disclosed only once “success” (aka a baby ) is achieved. Rarely do we hear about those who have been unsuccessful in the journey to motherhood and/or have been dealt multiple blows over the course of years and years. Infertility is still one of those closely guarded secrets that women keep to themselves, which is why I need to commend Holly Finn, the author of the article and of the new e-book “The Baby Chase” who bravely and honestly shares her experiences of IVF and the quest to have a child. While not the usual post you would find at a place like Babyccino Kids — I know that many of the moms out there can totally relate and I thought it was a good article to share.
-Dina
The funny things kids say
I love how honest kids are. They just have no social responsibility to obey the rules of etiquette — they can say things that grown-ups could never, ever get away with saying! And sometimes it is SO funny the things that come out of their little mouths. The other day my son (pictured) told me my forehead was bumpy (wrinkly). The week before he told me, as he sat in the bathroom with me, that my bum was too big it didn’t fit on the toilet! He has also told me that my sister’s boobs ‘look better’ than mine (which, by the way, is definitely true!). It’s a good thing I’m not overly sensitive — my self-esteem would be shattered by now with the amount of honest remarks my kids make. So tell me… what funny things have your kids said recently? Do you also have a ‘bumpy’ forehead or a ‘big bum’? And when do kids start to realise that they can’t be so honest all the time?
-Courtney
Bed Wetting
My oldest son was potty trained when he turned two, and was sleeping without a diaper by the time he was three, no problems whatsoever. My second son was also potty trained when he was two (and actually did it all on his own!)… but is STILL sleeping in a diaper at bedtime even at four years old. He just can’t seem to go the whole night without needing to wee!
I’ve talked to several friends, and it seems that most kids are sleeping in undies by the time they’re four. But I have some friends with even older kids (it seems mostly boys) who are still wetting the bed! So… is it genetic? Does bed-wetting happen to some kids in particular? What causes it? Smaller bladder maybe? Is it ‘treatable’ (for lack of a better word)? I’ve tried all the normal tricks, but nothing seems to work. Does anyone have any tips or experience to share?
-Courtney
The Talk
I have finally had The Talk with Coco who is now 5½. You know which talk I mean? The one where your innocent, little kid turns around to you and asks: where do babies come from? The Talk invariably happens at an inopportune moment, normally in a crowded tube or in a civilised, quiet restaurant while your kid should just be enjoying an ice-cream and certainly not be thinking about baby making.
I actually panicked, as this was a defining moment of her life! If I messed this one up, there could be years of therapy in front of my daughter, where she would blame me for messing up her sex life. But how do you go about it? Do you get technical, throw a book at your child and hope she figures it out, talk about birds and bees or even the stork? I thought I dealt with it reasonably well and only got stuck on the technicality of what sperms look like… which I decided could be dealt with later.
Yesterday we were walking down the street with a friend of mine who has recently become pregnant. She told Coco she had a baby in her tummy. Coco’s response was certainly direct: “You mean that you did the thing where you stuck the penis in the vagina?” Maybe I should have stuck with the stork version of the story! Have you talked to your kids about sex yet? Any tips?
-Emilie
Photo found via Antique Trader.
Egg Timer
I have just bought my first egg timer:
A) because I literally do not know how to boil an egg — they are either so undercooked that the egg white is still transparent or I forget about them and the egg yolk gets this really ugly grey cover, and
B) because my Aunt Liz, whose parenting advice I listen to more than Gina Ford and Tracy Hoggs combined, taught me a great trick — if the kids are fighting about a toy, simply put on the egg timer for a few minutes and the moment it rings they have to swap, then the egg timer goes back on until the next swap. Works like a charm. It turns out that kids are much more reactive to the ring of a egg timer than to my nagging voice. Must be some kind of a Pavlovian dog reaction…
-Emilie
Glitter Tattoos — Parent Approved
I am really not a fan of temporary tattoos for kids. Sure, fine, kids like them and all, but don’t you think they always look like a terrible, flakey mess after a few hours — not to mention the fact that there is always a fight when you have to remove them! I do however adore a simple and beautiful glitter tattoo (from time to time). While you used to only be able to get them done by people at street fairs and the like, they are now making easy to use stencil kits you can do at home. I found these incredible little boxed sets at the upper west side store Make Meaning and they have become a prized possession in our home. I just ordered a bunch for birthday gifts and now, thanks to my girls, I am sporting two of them. Also worth nothing they last up to a week and come in simple, kid-appropriate designs.
-Dina
The tooth fairy
It finally happened. Last night, while brushing her teeth, my oldest daughter lost her first tooth. She had been wobbling it for weeks and weeks, her silver tooth fairy box ready on her nightstand, waiting for the much anticipated treasure. And then, it finally came out. The bad news? We lost the tooth. She either swallowed it or spit it out with the toothpaste… Gone forever. So sad! Learn this lesson, fellow mums: brush with care when your kids teeth are very wobbly!
Tonight, I’m finding myself sewing a little tooth pillow like the one pictured from Oeuf. I love the fact that there’s a little pocket with room for a banknote and a letter from the tooth fairy. And next time, let’s hope we will have a tooth to stick in it!
xxx Esther
PS My daughter is getting SO big!!!
ONE YEAR AGO WE WROTE ABOUT:
• Sweet for Baby: Travel Bag By Maud• The Female Brain — Don’t blame me, blame the hormones…
Airplane Ear
Traveling with kids can be stressful enough as is but there is nothing worse than the oppressive hovering fear that someone will get “airplane ear.” I remember getting it a few times as a kid and it was just plain awful, so now, during take off and landing, I basically open up my own small concession stand – handing out lollipops, bottles of water and headphones (for some reason it helps) all while encouraging a “yawning” marathon. So what exactly is this sinister “airplane ear”? The technical name is “Barotrauma” which in a nutshell means trauma (yikes!) to your inner ear valve due to a a pressure differential. Flight attendants always suggest filling cups with warm soaked paper towels to hold over your ears or holding your nose and blowing (neither which has ever really worked for me at least). Sticking your fingers in your ears always seems to help (although probably not the best idea). Any other suggestions?
-Dina
When do you start giving chores?
This weekend something monumental happened in my house: the girls made me their very first breakfast. I grant you, it was an odd combination of cheese, cake and dried crackers and the plates and cups were not placed in the classic style BUT…. they were so proud of themselves, and it was one of my favourite breakfasts ever! It made me think that I don’t give Coco and Violette enough responsibility around the house.
As a single mom with a job (I am an animation producer during the day) I have the tendency to quickly tidy up, wash and clean, instead of investing time into teaching the girls how to clear up and wash the dishes and do simple tasks. Now I actually think I really need to take the time to let the girls get involved and give them the feeling of responsibility.
I am not (yet) going to ask them to whip up a soufflée for me, but rather to stack up the dishwasher, make their beds and fold away their clothes. I am sure that at the beginning they are going to think it is fun and after a while they’ll start finding their tasks annoying, but it is such an important part of growing up and learning how to take on responsibility.
I would love to hear about your experiences. At what age did you start giving your kids chores to do, or is this something that does not exist anymore?
P.S. The above is a photo of Coco and Vivi working very hard at making pancakes.
