Where do babies come from???
For some reason (age??) I have quite a few pregnant friends. Four of them are pregnant with number three (Courtney amongst them), and the pressure is on for me to get pregnant again! (Not yet, I keep saying, not yet..!)
Last week our neighbour, Colette, gave birth to her third baby, a little girl. I called my 3-year-old daughter, who was on spring break and staying with her grandparents in the south of the country, and told her that the little baby in Colette’s belly finally came out. She thought about it a second and then asked me ‘But mummy, how did the baby get out?’.
Thankfully, I was able to pass the question back to my mother-in-law (‘That’s a good question honey, Oma will explain everything to you after we hang up’). But I keep thinking — how do you explain the whole thing to a nearly-4-year-old??
Like: First mummy will have a really bad tummy ache and then the baby will come out from between her legs? Or even: Mummy will have to go to the hospital and the doctor will cut her belly open and get the baby out, but don’t worry it won’t hurt and everybody will be fine??
Any thoughts about this, anyone?
xxx Esther
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My son is also asking a TON of questions. Things like… “can the baby see the food in your tummy?” or “can the baby see your bones?” or “where does the baby do a poo inside your tummy?”.
He’s also asking a lot of questions about how the baby comes out. Things like “will your tummy break when the baby comes out?”.
I decided to be honest with him about everything. I brought out some of my baby books and showed him photos.
But I never told him that it will hurt me. I never mentioned pain. I don’t want him to be scared for me!
I told my kids that the doctor has special tools to open my belly and get the baby out. (I didn’t want to mention cutting, because I thought that sounded too scarey)
I also told them that it is hard work to get a baby out & my belly and I will very tired for a few days, and they’ll have to be extra gentle with me.
They seemed to accept those explainations (they are 4 and 2 1/2) but check back with me in a couple of weeks if you want to know how it really goes.
We also visited an empty hospital room so that the environment won’t seem so intimidating & I talked with them about the IV.
and then there is the whole question of how the baby got inside in the first place! my parents made the mistake of telling me a little bit about makin’ babies when i was 5 and my mom was pregnant with my little brother. later that same day, they found me under the covers with the neighbor boys, “making babies!” albeit, fully clothed, phew!
best of luck…
My nearly-3-year-old girl asked me the same thing, and I answered almost the same way you did. As I told the story to a friend mine, she just said “thank got she did not ask how the baby got in!”
It’s true, that’s a whole other story. She didn’t ask a thing about how the baby got there in the first place!
It’s just a matter of time, I have no idea how to deal with the “how are babies made” question. Hopefully one of your kids ask first and you can give me a couple of pointers!
Funny, my 4 year old is curious too, having a friend who was pregnant and when she asked her how the baby came out my friend told her the doctor opens a special magic door to get the baby out. Having to think quick on her feet, this was probably not the best of explanations but the topic was never mentioned again. Having said that, once she starts school, I expect it will come up again for greater analysis. Anything with “magic” attached to it seems to satisfy beautiful, innocent minds, so I am happy for her to believe that for now. As for how it got there in the first place, my explanation was that the mummy and daddy have a “special cuddle” after which God puts a little baby in the mummy’s tummy to grow and love. Again, sometimes the simplest and most innocent of explanations are enough